Universe of Springer, English poetry, insane humour

"Welcome to the universe of Jerry Springer,"
Cigar smoking, mocking, dwarf cried.
"I do not dwell in your abode,"
I stoically replied.
The coinage in his pockets
It jangled remorselessly.
Springer's eyes were a vacuum
I perceived with clarity
He peddled empty answers
Boasting with great alacrity
A spiritual klaxon sounded,
As the midget blustered and bounded
I thought him quite pokey.

Celestial Errors

I am the holder of the celestial keys of custard!
A million decibels of gathered penguins enchant my mistakes.
This is your Captain speaking
Baron Von Munchhausen de trop
When the toaster pops you shall learn of my coming!
A flaxen haired beeswax snorting pawn of the dice man
An android on steroids seeking tithes at K-Mart.

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