<Insane English Humour>
You Need Hands: The Musical Cheshire Cat Mage in Escher's Structure
Secret Strikes of The Underdog
Universe of Springer
Ballad of Mad Dave
George Bush Joke
Wizard in a grid
Window woman
Ode to Greenblob
Antler King
The Last Trial of Father Smith
Stella and Sortini, Urban Legends
Microsoft's Space Opera
Penguin Adventure
Hitler Pet
Stella & Sortini poetry

<The Other Mages>
The Elves in Our Backyard
Resisting Reality
Lovesick
Resist Worry
Fools Gold
Drunkenness
Call Vandals

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This is written in the style of Douglas Adams' Vogon poetry

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Ode to Greenblob, Vogon poetry, insane humour

Greenblob, thou doth nestle
Like a nettle
Midst the rose petals of June
And many a good tune
Has been plucked on an old fiddle
Existence without thee
I call an unlucky unbearable
Test my metal
And thou shalt regreteth not
Thine decision
Greenblob, my interminable riddle
Let me pamper your fetlocks
Ice Maiden! Ice Maiden!
Take me to thine tower
Lock me in Fort Knox
Melt just a little for me
Smile and be mine crocodile
Set me to love's labours
Let me do your laundry
Give me a duster of feathers pink
And I shalt neither shirk nor slink
But forever think
Of thee as mine top priority
And keeping thine skirting boards
Pristine and squeaky clean
I shall put thee on a pedestal
Higher than sluts, blow jobs
Even football
Beers, slags and tarts
Greenblob! Greenblob!
(shouted very loud)
Let us start
A beautiful love affair
Let's farm Aardvarks
Trample the road to nowhere
Let us writhe in ecstasy
Quest after flamingos,
Experiment with jelly
And try to get on daytime telly
"Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"
I promise never to escape
And that this is not a part
Of some convoluted scheme
To suddenly change mine character
And endeavour to sleep with
Thine skinnier prettier sister
Or your best mate
I'm a bona fine Romeo
Definitely not a bogus swine
Nor a contrary shark
I swear on the honour that is thine
I harbour no such dreams
Greenblob! Greenblob! - be mine
Lo, verily, I'm down on mine knees
Go on, thou knowst thou wantst to
Pretty please!
Don't make me gwarth mine jibbitwaithes!
Hark! It's 3:28 and thoughts of thee
Doth keep me awake.

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